My old fear has resurfaced. When I was pregnant with Tiffany, I was so scared of that first ultrasound. The possiblity of not hearing that heartbeat was almost too much to bear. It was the same with Benjamin. Now here I am trying to get pregnant again and all I can think about is the miscarriage. This is our first month of trying and it just happens to be the same month that we conceived our first pregnancy. I know it is completly irrational, but I can't seem to calm my inner fears. Should we wait a month or just leave it in God's hands? I have come through this journey believing that God is guiding my heart so I am tempted to leave at that and accept whatever happens. But then fear sets in again. Who will win? Tune in next week for the final results.
