Refresh. Regrow. Renew.

Its been a lousy month but it has also been wonderful. Lousy really isn't the best word to describe it though, crappy and shitty describe it better. It started with a very sweet woman who apparently forgot how navigate roads. She stopped in our own lane, for no reason I can ascertain, causing me to run into her. I take full responsibility for it but I do wonder what caused her to stop. A prancing pony perhaps. Or maybe she was making shapes out of the clouds. Thankfully, it was only a minor accident but my daughter was injured in the accident as well as my radiator. Both have healed but not the guilt that plagues me. It is hard to see her wound and know that it is my fault but I try to see beyond that because I know that it could happen to anyone.

So for the last month I have been without a car leaving me stuck at home with three very restless children. My sanity has wavered more than once but I am still holding strong. There have been other but more mild reasons for the crappy month that I have experienced. Since the accident, we have had five colds, 3 fevers, 2 broken doors, 3 leaks, an injured dog, one pair of broken glasses, a stomach virus that we all caught, an ear infection and other events that for obvious reasons I have blocked out. Not to mention that finances are still low, uncomfortably so.

All of these things taught me something very wonderful though. Life does not need my help to move faster and it is time to slow down. We have been playing games, finishing up with our school, making crafts, baking sweet treats and just having fun at home. I am actually getting caught up with many tasks I have been putting off. Writing is also coming back into my life, slowly but at least I can do it now. For all the struggles that we have been through this month, life is really good and we are happy.

Deepak Chopra said, "All great changes are preceded by chaos." I saw this on face book while writing this post and thought in fitting considering the chaos that has been my life. Great changes on the way.

Letters are amazing little things. They make such interesting sounds all alone or with a little company. Who knew that one day I would wish for some q, r, s and maybe some th, nb and a little tch. Without them books would have no meaning and pencils everywhere would cease to exist. Wonderful little letters . . . how I love you!