After having our sweet baby boy, I decided that I was through with pregnancy. From here on out we would adopt and that was it. I was done with morning sickness for 9 months. I mean really, why would anyone in their right mind want to go through that for a third time, especially when there are so many children in need of good homes waiting at adoption centers all over the world? My decision has stayed with me since then. In January, we even took apart the cradle and began to get baby stuff ready to sell. Not even a week later, I felt this overwhelming desire to have another baby. Where is the hell is this coming from? I would look around me and see that I was alone or was I? A few days later, I got the chance to hold a 3 month old baby and I was in tears while I held her in my arms and realized that God was speaking to me through this little angel. It is time. So I shared my feelings with hubby and he was actually relieved since he thought he was in trouble for something. Silly guy! We both agreed but decided to wait a couple of months to be sure that I was sure.
Well, here I am absolutely sure and absolutely convinced that this is God's will for my life. Why then am I being slowed down? I have an IUD for birth control and my doctor has tried 3 times to remove without success. Now I must go to the hospital so she can sedate me and use a camera to find it. Is this really worth all the trouble? Am I sure that I am following God's path? Am I being selfish to want another baby when so many need homes? Why is He making this more difficult than it has to be? Can I handle having 3 kids? I don't claim to know but I do know that God knows and He will not fail me now.
A clear sign would be nice, but I will be content in the small amount of faith I do have.
