Refresh. Regrow. Renew.

- Tiffany no longer takes naps but I insist that she have rest time in her room. One day, I enter her room to find it empty. 'Hmmm . . . that's strange,' I thought. But wait! It is that what I think it is? Could it be? Yes! Tiffany has somehow managed to crawl into her pillowcase (with her pillow still inside) and curl up into a ball. That would be my genes coming through, I can so see myself doing that as a kid.

- Alternate name for Pump-It-Up, the inflatable jumping party place for kids. Pump-N-Dumps.

- One day we come home from the grocery store and the kids dart inside leaving me to bring in the groceries. This is no surprise since my kids are two and four. As I approach the front door loaded with groceries, I realize that my wonderful two year son has locked the door. I curse and kick the door (the only appendage left to me) trying to get my daughter's attention. It wasn't working. I look through the door window and see Benny trying to undo his damage and Tiffany hiding behind a couch laughing at me. I can only imagine how I must have looked from the street. A disheveled woman loaded with plastic bags, kicking and screaming threats of severe punishments to the children inside. Yeah, I would have called the cops if I had seen that. I finally get inside and after sending the imps to their room, I realize that it will be a while before I think this is funny. A long while.

- A comment from my dear sweet little daughter after reading her book before bed, "I can see your tummy Mommy, it's fat!" Goodnight sweethart, I'm going to the gym now!

- Sitting in Benny's room waiting for him to return from using the bathroom, I hear a strange sound. It takes me a minute to realize what it is. Splashing. Who would be splashing? Oh, Shit, I think as I bolt to the bathroom! Yep, Benny was splashing in the potty . . . before flushing it. Needless to say, we had bathtime a little early that day.

- My dessert rule is simple: eat your dinner, get dessert - don't eat dinner, get fruit. When Benny refused to eat his dinner, Tiffany got ice cream and Benny got a banana. Tiffany felt bad for Benny and asked to share hers with her brother. How could I refuse that? She is so sweet, sometimes.

- Upon entering Benny's room in the middle of the night, I find out what caused his screaming tears. The Monster Ate Me! Damn Monsters!